The Mirror Moment - Part 3

What if the Mirror Reflects a Culture of Fear?

Audra Stevenson
August 11, 2025 • Estimated Reading Time: 8 minutes

In this issue…

The Mirror Moment - Part 3: What if the Mirror Reflects a Culture of Fear? - by Audra Stevenson
Extra Insights: 5 Bold Moves to Quickly Transform Your Organization’s Culture - Brooke Weddle, John Parsons, Wyman Howard (McKinsey & Co)
Weekly Motivation Boost: Les Brown on Motivation & Fear - HESMotivation (YouTube)
Action for the Week: Nurture Work Relationships
Together with HubSpot: 100 ChatGPT to Transform Your Efficiency

🎯 EXPERT OF THE WEEK

The Mirror Moment - Part 3: What if the Mirror Reflects a Culture of Fear?

By Audra Stevenson

You can’t coach a team into trust…you have to rebuild it from the inside out.

Self-awareness can sharpen your decisions, shift your mindset and strengthen your relationships. But what happens when the mirror reveals something deeper? Perhaps something harder to face?

What if the culture you've built is rooted in fear?

What if silence isn’t alignment - it’s self-protection?

What if your team isn’t disengaged because they’re lazy, but because they’re afraid?

This is where reflection meets responsibility. For leaders who are willing to do the work, it can mark the beginning of one of the most powerful transformations of their career.

When Feedback Isn’t Safe

Let’s be honest - people don’t stop caring overnight. They stop speaking up when it no longer feels safe. Fear-based cultures don’t always start with malice. They often start with pressure. With reactive decisions. With leaders who are trying to control outcomes instead of developing people. But regardless of the intent, the impact is the same:

Employees hesitate to share honest opinions.
Teams stay quiet in meetings, nodding instead of challenging.
Innovation stalls.
Turnover creeps up.
Engagement evaporates.

If you’re the leader, that means the repair starts with you.

Step 1: Name It

You can’t rebuild trust without first acknowledging where it was lost. That means dropping the defensiveness. Try this:

“I’ve realized that I haven’t always contributed to an environment where people felt safe to be open. That’s on me. I want to do better and I’m committed to learning how.”

You don’t need a lengthy apology. You need sincerity, accountability and a clear signal that things are going to change. This small step cracks the door to trust.

Step 2: Lead with Action, Not Demands

When psychological safety is low, don’t start by asking for feedback. Start by changing your behavior in visible, consistent ways:

Publicly acknowledge your own mistakes.
Celebrate small wins that come from others’ ideas, not just your own.
Replace control with curiosity when something goes wrong.
Pause before reacting and ask more questions.

People need to see that something’s different before they believe they can be.

Step 3: Bring in a Neutral Partner

If fear is present, honest feedback won’t come through a survey or open-door policy. Your team likely won’t feel comfortable saying what needs to be said - especially if they’ve learned that candor carries consequences.

This is where an executive coach, facilitator or trusted HR partner can help. Have them gather input through anonymous interviews, listening sessions or surveys. Then do something bold:

Share what you learned. Own it. Explain what you’re going to do about it.

Let your team see that this isn’t just about performance reviews. It’s about you taking accountability and choosing to lead better.

Step 4: Start with Safer Questions

Once you're ready to re-engage in one-on-one conversations, avoid big, risky questions like “How can I improve?” or “What am I doing wrong?” Instead, begin with smaller, specific and safer asks:

“What’s one thing I could do differently to support you better in your role or this project?”
“Is there anything I could simplify or clarify in our meetings?”
“What’s something we used to do that helped you feel more engaged?”

These questions invite honesty without demanding vulnerability.

Step 5: Reward Candor Every Time

When someone does speak up, no matter how small the feedback, do three things:

Say thank you.
Don’t defend or explain.
Follow up on what you heard and let the team see the result. That’s how you normalize candor.

People will believe what they experience long before they believe what you say.

Step 6: Be Patient

You can’t microwave trust. If fear has lived in your culture for a while, it may take months of consistent action before your team lets their guard down. Don’t rush the process. Stay accountable. Keep showing up with honesty, humility and follow-through.

When leaders do that, the results are extraordinary. Teams shift from compliance to commitment. Communication opens. Engagement climbs. Ownership spreads. And most importantly - trust returns.

Coming Next: The Ripple Effect of Courageous Leadership

In the final part of this series, we’ll share what happens when leaders embrace self-awareness, repair trust and model growth consistently. We’ll look at how performance, culture, trust and retention all improve when leadership starts with humility.

Read Part 1: The Mirror Moment - Why the Best Leaders Start with Themselves

Read Part 2: The Mirror Moment - Self-Awareness Is a Competitive Advantage

AUDRA STEVENSON is an experienced HR and Talent Acquisition leader with a passion for building high-performing teams, fostering authentic relationships and creating workplace cultures where people thrive. With a background supporting national construction firms and a deep understanding of the employee experience, she brings a people-first approach to leadership, communication and organizational growth.